tbh i could delete everything off my blog except my music recs tag and the quality of my blog would skyrocket instantly
well okay. also the #textures and #botany tags, they can stay too
I GOT THE EMAIL THIS MORNING IT’S OKAY I AM ALSO SCREAMING AND HAVE BEEN SCREAMING NONSTOP SINCE IT DROPPED
zimmingham replied to your post “there was a point where i was convinced that if i, as someone who…”
i was never into kink memes, why are they so bad
because people get real nasty when they don’t want to hear that they’re getting off on something that harms other people
i think i might have had this icon for over a year by now but it’s still the best self-portrait i’ve ever drawn
aaaaaggghhh why is it in San Francisco
to cause pain to you specifically i suspect
i am still in oakland, i will be in oakland for at least another year because we’re about to renew our lease, never fear
but i’ll see about stopping by! not that i have any money to donate. thanks for letting me know!
stonelions replied to your post “there was a point where i was convinced that if i, as someone who…”
jesus i can hardly even imagine…
i will never be well-adjusted enough for that
unrelated: i have 808 followers and i’m snickering worse than any 420 joke ever could have caused
there was a point where i was convinced that if i, as someone who strove for responsibility and accessibility, took the initiative and started a kink meme, i could make it into something less hurtful and more positive and community-building. but then when i actually did try, any initiative i took was fought and ridiculed, and those who agreed with me, if they existed, could not or would not come to my defense. my co-mods, whom i invited in to help when the work became too much for me, were also unprepared or unwilling to stand up for my policies. eventually, i could not cope with it anymore.
i still wish there were more spaces with the kink meme format that were safer for everyone who wanted to participate, but i realise what kind of strength and sacrifice that requires, and i don’t trust people who would not be taxed by that kind of response to do the right thing anyway.
"Always believe people about abuse" sounds like a good rule but it isn’t.
It is really, really important to remember that abusers often accuse their victims of abuse.